Letters
2004-10-05 @ 1:14 p.m.

Yep, I know it's my second entry for the day, but hey, I couldn't resist. So, here goes....
Dear Me,
You do one of two things every morning while getting ready for work. You either listen to a local station on the radio, or listen/watch the news. Generally you do this so you can double check what the weather guy said yesterday about today. Why do you do this if you aren't going to listen? Don't you know that the big green blobs are rain? And, that yellow stuff, that means there's probably even some thunder and lighting envolved. So, what compelled you to leave the window down in the car?

Love,
Just Curious

Dear Lady In Front of Me,
Who the hell pays for lunch at Wendy's in the drive through, in the pouring rain, BY CHECK? If you're going to have to roll your window down far enough to give them the check, your DL and then get it back to sign it and in return hand it again to them... GO IN! The rest of us are cold, wet, and want to get back off the mean streets of North Texas.

Sincerely,
A. Little Impatient

Dear Man Behind Me,
There is absoutely nothing I can do about the woman infront of me. She's a moron. What can I say? Please do not honk your really loud horn in my fragile ear. The left one just happens to be the only one of the two I have that has full hearing capabilities, and you may have just ruined that.
Thank you in advance for your concern.

Graciously,
Co-chair for the foundation of hearing loss due to idiots

Dear God,
I know you're all powerful and watching my every move. So I know you see how much of a pain it is for me to have to travel by car in this town when it's raining like this.
I also know that you promised you'd never flood the Earth again the way you did in Noah's times. However, just because we've evolved in our thinking enough to actually put in storm drains, does not mean we are challenging you to a battle of wills. You do not have to prove your point.

My Deepest Affections,
The Human Race

Thanks, I feel better... Now, where's that hot chocolate?