Night from Hell
2004-04-13 @ 10:28 a.m.

I'm only relaying the events of last night to you because well, I need to tell someone who won't laugh at me, and even if they do, at least I can't hear them. You know, kinda like the whole, if tree falls in the forrest and there's no one there to hear it, did it really fall, type of thing.

Anyway, I left work a few minutes early,went home got some laundry together and took it to Marks to wash. Picked Emma up from school, dropped her off at Mom's so I could do some grocery shopping. Made it home, put up the groceries, and then picked Emma up from Mom's. She then decided that she wanted to go to On The Border for dinner (Emma wanted chicken, I wanted Mexian, so we had mexican chicken). Within five minutes of getting our food, Emma starts to throw up. EVERYWHERE. I jumped up to grab something to try to clean her up, but it just kept coming. By the time she stopped it was all over her. Luckily not much landed on the table, floor or chair, it was suffciently soaked into her clothes. I took her clothes off of her in the middle of the resturaunt, and leaned down to pick her jacket up off the floor so she'd have something on when we walked outside into the 40* with a wind chill of 28* weather. (Our waiter, a friend, had already gotten to go boxes for us, and packed up dinner at this point.) As I did this, I suddenly felt something cold on my rear side. I thought maybe in all the hustle bustle I'd spilt my coke and bumped into the table and gotten some on my jeans.

Heh. Wishful thinking.

The cold I felt was the cold air from the front door touching my bare ass. My jeans had ripped all the way from the top of the pocket midway down my left thigh.

So, there I am with a half naked, puking baby exposing my (cute if I do say so) ass to the world. And all I can think is "Thank god I'm wearing the black lace panties".

Now, you know you're a real woman, mom, adult when you can pick up your to go box of uneaten, unstarted dinner, your freezing naked two year old, and puke covered clothes, walk out of a packed resturaunt bareing your ass to the whole place and not cry until 3 hours later when you're finally alone in bed.

I'm ready for a nap, and it's only 10:37.